Coming back to relationships

17th July 2020

The following was written by Corinna Bolton of Pathway Balancing. Corinna is a Senior Practitioner of the British Register of Complementary Practitioners, which is administered by the CHO. This piece is particularly apt at this time when we're starting to re-kindle connections and relationships.

" I closed the front door behind me and turned around. Instead of stepping towards the garage door, I began to walk down my drive towards the road. I felt a strange shiver of anxious vulnerability that surprised me. It was the first time in twelve weeks that I'd left the house without stepping straight into the protective shell of my car. As I continued to walk down the familiar path of the nice, quiet area where I live, the atmosphere seemed unusual and heavy. I noticed car after car rammed side by side on every drive way and even a few tilted up on the kerb. There was no movement anywhere.  Why were all these people at home, going nowhere?

Then I realised that at 7:25pm on this Wednesday evening there was nowhere that they could go. Pubs were closed, restaurants closed, the gym, shops, cinema, offices, hairdressers, beauticians and of course therapy practices - all shut down. Even visiting another house was strictly limited to one single-person household being allowed to connect with just one other home in an exclusive social bubble. As I arrived at my Church Life Group Leader's front door, I felt so sad at the oppressive system of social distancing that had locked down our nation into months of isolation and economic damage.

The Heart of Real Relationships
Thank God for the saving grace of communications technology! The TV, phone, texting, emails, WhatsApp, Google and the sudden explosion of Zoom video meetings. All these were great interim supports but, like so many people, I soon found them becoming unsatisfying and even an irritation, joining the ranks of the 'Zoom Fatigued'. Seeing a moving image of someone's face and hearing a transmitted signal carrying their voice imprint, just doesn't constitute a full, embodied, relational connection. So what's missing? The heart beat that connects one life to another.

Body and Soul
My understanding is that the soul is the essence of who you are - your personality, mind and free will. It is joined to your body through conception and separates at your physical death. Your spirit is your breath of life and the whole of your being unites through your heart. The electromagnetic wave produced by your unique heart rhythm can be measured up to eight feet around you. When you physically touch another person, your heart's wave pattern momentarily registers as a wave pattern in their brain. The complex structures of the emotional brain are all designed for relationship. We need each other.

Needing each other leaves us vulnerable to being hurt or abandoned. Our body registers the experiences of our relationships and literally shapes the neurobiology of our brain and nerves accordingly. The power of Kinesiology and Craniosacral Therapy is that both of them work directly with the body to reshape the effects of our relational experiences. Clearing residues of past emotional hurts leaves the body and brain clear to form new, healthy relational structures and patterns of behaviour. We then have the energy and awareness to come back into our relationships as a secure, authentic, whole-hearted person. It's time to begin again and to meet people with our heart and soul fully present in our body."

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